OPENING SEGMENT: BRAUN STROWMAN, DREW McINTYRE, & DOLPH ZIGGLER
The heels run down the Shield, talk about who is going to win the WWE World Cup, then are interrupted by The Shi…. nope, Roman and Seth. Seth calls himself the best in the world. He did that this past week and asked said he wanted a match against Kenny Omega. Omega and Tommaso Ciampa responded. I’m all for that mess of humanity. Rollins gets some cheap Philly pops. None of the promos were that good or that long. I wasn’t a huge fan of this opening. I think it’s because this feud has been stale and boring.
Segment Rating: Two Katie Vicks
WWE WORLD CUP QUALIFYING MATCH: SETH ROLLINS VS. DREW McINTYRE
They look slow. Usually McIntyre and Rollins are terrific together in the ring, but something feels off tonight, like they’re just trying to kill time. Also, why is Roman not out there to help Seth? Ziggler comes out to help McIntyre, but Rollins is left without support. That doesn’t make sense.
Finally we get some good action towards the end of the match, some actual good kicks and good energy. Dean Ambrose out of nowhere to attack Ziggler, and Rollins with a stomp on McIntyre to the outside, for some reason Cole says he needs to get McIntyre back in the ring, but Rollins proves Cole’s an idiot by just sliding back in and winning by count out. It got exciting in the waning moments, but overall, not their best.
Match Rating: Two Gold Medals
Dean Ambrose is not happy with Seth and Roman. What else is new. Why does he make the save just to get pissed afterwards?
BACKSTAGE SEGMENT: BROTHERS OF DESTRUCTION
This is awesome. Except Kane’s parts… they were ok. Undertaker was awesome.
Promo Rating: Six Undertakers
EMBER MOON & NIA JAX VS. TAMINA & DANA BROOKE
Haven’t seen Tamina in a long time. She looks good. They announce a women’s battle royal for Evolution, which is pretty awesome to get more women involved. The crowd pops for Tamina vs. Nia, and I definitely wanna see this matchup. Tamina hits a pretty awesome Samoan Drop on Nia. Ember Moon beats Dana Brooke with the Eclipse, unfortunately Dana gave it a shitty sell. After the match Tamina drops Nia with a super kick. They all do the obligatory throw people over the top rope before a battle royal. Yawn.
Match Rating: Four Gold Medals
RONDA ROUSEY!
Oh no, she called out the Bellas. Nikki called her a loser. She’s gonna put the L on her forehead now. “This is show business, not show friends.” Nice one Brie. OMG the head bobbing. I want to knock it off her shoulders. If the WWE is playing into people’s real life hate of the Bellas…. through gritted teeth I say good job. Ronda sounds so real and natural. She calls the Bellas out for what they are: camera whores. I could listen to Ronda burn them all night. They should make a three-hour Raw of Ronda Rousey insulting the Bellas. “You’re all just jealous” – great comeback Brie. This may be the rest segment Ronda has ever done. Hell, this may be the best Raw segment of the year.
Ronda Rousey Promo Rating: Ten Ronda Rouseys
Bellas Promo Rating: Six Bellas
Segment Rating: Ten This Is Your Lifes
Kurt Angle is enjoying vacation. Too bad Corbin puts him in a match tonight… WAIT, WHAT! KURT ANGLE IN A MATCH!!! HELL YEAH!!! Oooooooohhhh it’s against AOP. Shit.
WWE WORLD CUP QUALIFYING MATCH: DEAN AMBROSE VS. DOLPH ZIGGLER
Good intensity in this one. A lot more intensity than the Rollins-McIntyre match. Ziggler hits an awesome facebuster off the top rope that almost looked like a Pedigree. McIntyre helps Ziggler, and Rollins comes down to help Ambrose. Ambrose throws Rollins off of him as he Rollins tries to help him up, and rolls back into the ring, right into a super kick. They’re gonna keep running with this. Give me some kinda payoff, please!
Match Rating: Six Gold Medals
We get some pushing and shoving between Rollins and Ambrose after the match while Reigns plays mediator. Out comes Baron Corbin to be a dick. And he makes The Shield vs. Strowman, McIntyre, & Ziggler. For the main event. Again. Please make it stop.
FINN BALOR w/BAYLEY VS. JINDER MAHAL w/ALICIA FOX & THE SINGH BROTHERS
Samir Singh is back! Great, Jinder’s opponents had been needing someone else to launch through tables. Wow, I looked away and Finn won. Cool. I dunno how to rate this match then. Oh well. Out come Bobby Lashley & Lio Rush.
BOBBY LASHLEY w/LIO RUSH VS. TYLER BREEZE
This is certainly effective at garnering heat. Graves just stole a line that Jerry Lawler used about Nicole Bass when he said “Lashley has muscles in places that most people don’t even have places.” It was a million times funnier when Lawler said Nicole Bass “Has muscles in places that most women don’t even have places,” for obvious reasons. Tyler Breeze gets destroyed and has to listen to Lio Rush squawk about it the whole time. Rush is Jimmy Hart meets Slick, and I think it’s working. Good match because of Lashley’s heel work and Rush’s added commentary.
Match Rating: Five Gold Medals
Titus O’Neil gets rightly recognized for the work he does in the African-American community.
TRISH & LITA
It quickly becomes four with Alexa Bliss & Mickie James. I find myself not caring about this at all. Decent heel promo from Bliss & James. Trish is not good on the mic. Oh wow, they are pulling an Iverson. That was pretty lame. Of course Bliss & James are gonna chicken out. Why are Trish & Lita not chasing them? This was not well done at all in my mind.
Alexa Bliss & Mickie James Promo: Two Sensational Sherris
Trish Stratus & Lita Promo: One Bella
Segment Rating: One Katie Vick
The Riott Squad picks on Bayley. Bayley looks mad. Bayley is gonna fight.
KURT ANGLE (AS THE CONQUISTADOR??) VS. AUTHORS OF PAIN w/DRAKE MAVERICK
That’s not Kurt Angle. I dunno who it is, but it’s not Angle. Angle is going to attack Corbin from behind. AOP makes quick for of the Conquistador. Corey – “Where’d they find that slug?” Angle attacks Corbin with an Angle Slam, as I said he would. ROCK ON!
Booking Rating: Seven Dustys
The Riott Squad smears some paint on Natalya’s dressing room. Since when does Natalya get her own dressing room?
NATALYA w/SASHA BANKS & BAYLEY VS. RUBY RIOTT w/SARAH LOGAN & LIV MORGAN
Nice, Natalya brings back up and we’re gonna get some chaos. Renee says the Riott Squad is like Hocus Pocus. She should have said The Sanderson Sisters. Come on, Renee! Natalya and Ruby are both great in the ring. Natalya locks in the Sharpshooter, Sarah Logan gets Ruby disqualified, everyone fights, then the Riott Squad takes out Sasha & Bayley. The faces fight recover and fight back, and the Riott Squad gets their asses kicked. Predictable but fun. Corey Graves: “Renee, is there any truth to the rumor that Sasha Banks’ own mother wishes she was adopted?”
Match Rating: Six Gold Medals
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN: ELIAS
Elias attacks Philly where it hurts most: the Eagles and Flyers. He even shits on Gritty! That’s just uncalled for. Apollo Crews interrupts, and is given a microphone for the first time in a while. I really, really hope that means good things for him. He is way too talented to keep stagnating. Elias keeps ripping into the Flyers. Apollo is sick of being passed by. If this is a battle of words, Crews doesn’t stand a chance. Thankfully it’s about to get physical, and now Crews gets a nice and deserved pop with a long gorilla press slam. Crews’ promo was shitty but his ring work speaks for itself.
Segment Rating: Three This Is Your Lifes
THE SHIELD VS. BRAUN STROWMAN, DOLPH ZIGGLER, & DREW McINTYRE
Again. AGAIN. I do love hearing Strowman scream during the match. “TAG ME IN! TAG ME IN!” McIntyre and Strowman keep trying to one-up each other in beating up Roman. Reigns with a decent Samoan Drop on Strowman, but Ziggler & McIntyre knock Rollins & Ambrose off the apron so he can’t make a a tag. They hit the Claymore/Zig Zag on Reigns but his brothers make the save. Reigns finally makes a tag to Rollins, who tags in Ambrose for a double team on the heels. I want to see a triple power bomb tonight. Ambrose hits McIntyre with Dirty Deeds, but Rollins gets launched into Ambrose to break up the pin. Ambrose nearly hits Rollins with Dirty Deeds! Reigns comes in to absolutely clean house, spear on McIntyre, TRIPLE POWERBOMB ON ZIGGLER! Shield wins. I got my wish. I didn’t want this match again, but at least they made it really good.
Match Rating: Eight Gold Medals
Strowman is RIPPIN’. Power slam on Ziggler, then McIntyre hits Strowman with the Claymore! Well we know which group has the bigger issues right now.
Some really good, some really bad, still way too much focus on one feud that’s mostly lost it’s luster, though the dissolution of the heel trio is intriguing.
Overall Show Rating: Six Gold Medals
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