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Fun action early with both guys showing the crowd what they’re in for with dueling displays of athleticism. An appreciative “205” chant breaks out. Tremendously quick pace and great chain wrestling by both guys. If you’re not watching this show, START! You can watch ANY TIME on demand! And it’s only an hour! Much less demanding than Raw or SmackDown, and lately it’s been much better TV.
On the kickoff show, the Raw women’s team is already fighting themselves when Ruby Riott brings up Anvil’s sunglasses. Why did SmackDown pick Mandy Rose and not Nikki Cross?? Lame.
B’N’B are really fun together. If only they weren’t booked like shit separately. Renee talks about the “lack of disrespect from Bobby Lashley to Finn Bálor”. Ok. Bayley runs straight into a super kick from Mickie James that looked like it knocked a few teeth loose. Lio Rush rush screaming from Bálor, and ends up getting a Belly to Bayley. Mickie James wins with a DDT. Nothing too special about this one.
Match Rating: Three Gold Medals
Naomi has horns. The was one of the worst rap battles in a long history of bad WWE rap battles. The match was just as bad.
Match Rating:
Britain tries and fails miserably to start a CM Punk chant. Tools. So… is Shane reversing what would have been a good heel turn? I hope not. That’s what it would seem like as he chooses Daniel Bryan as the SmackDown Live men’s Survivor Series team captain. He names Miz co-captain, so… I don’t fucking know. I’m not gonna rate this segment because I still don’t know what to make of it.
Miz and Bryan agree to Shane as the next person on their team, and Miz lets DB have the next pick.
So there’s going to be a tag team Survivor Series elimination match? Did that happen last year? I don’t remember. It seems like overkill. If there’s any justice, SAnitY will jump in and destroy everybody. I was highly entertained by Kofi’s seizure distraction while Big E came out of nowhere with a clothesline. Big E is DOMINATING this match, until Jimmy Uso throws him into the timekeeper’s area.
Kofi does a giant trust fall until both Usos from the top turnbuckle. I have no idea how Kofi doesn’t break his neck doing the SOS. He also landed way high, on Jey Uso’s face, on a top-rope cross-body splash. Big E back up gets back to trucking his competition with a spear on Jey through the ropes to the outside. He is a wrecking machine and is the best part of a really good match. Jimmy Uso hits a splash on Kofi to pick up the win for his team. The Usos give respect to New Day after the match and make them their first pick for Team SmackDown Live. New Day accepts.
Match Rating: Eight Gold Medals
Daniel Bryan makes Rey Mysterio his next pick. Miz says only if Mysterio impresses in his match against Almas tonight. I really enjoy how they will choose their final member: each picks a wrestler and they face each other, winner gets the last spot.
I can’t wait until Becky and Ronda get at each other. She says she’s gonna make Ronda her bitch, and calls out anyone. SAnitY?? Will it be NIKKI CROSS?? HELL YEAH! AND she’s back with SAnitY! This is fucking awesome.
Becky Lynch Promo Rating: Seven Becky Lynches
Nikki is giving a hell of a showing in her SmackDown Live debut. She’s batshit insane and it’s an awesome style. Nikki gets a two-count with a cross body from the top turnbuckle, and hits an inverted DDT to take control of the champ until Becky bounces her off the bottom rope then locks in the Dis-Arm-Her. Nikki taps out, but that was a good match
Match Rating: Six Gold Medals
Daniel Bryan makes Jeff Hardy his final pick, while Miz is going to pick Randy Orton. Nope, I predicted incorrectly, it’s Samoa Joe. I’m rarely wrong, but I’ll eat shit on this one.
Shinsuke cuts a decent promo on Rollins. A little chilling even.
Promo Rating: Two Jake Roberts
No Vega for Almas tonight. Good fast early pace from two well-traveled luchadors. That pace slows after Almas FLOORS Mysterio with a back elbow. After Almas catches Rey’s hurrancanrana attempt on the outside, he swings him HARD into the barricade. Rey has always been one who takes a lot of punishment.
I think Mysterio caught Almas in the head with his knee. That didn’t look good. Two straight running double knees in the corner by Almas gets a two count on Mysterio, I can’t believe he kicked out. They botch a tilt-a-whirl back breaker as I don’t think Rey’s back ever hit Almas’ knee. Come on guys, fast doesn’t mean accurate. Get the moves right.
They make up for it with an awesome sequence in the outside including a hurracanrana into the ring apron and a diving DDT by Mysterio. He hits the 619 and Drops the Dimeo n Almas for the win, likely securing his spot on the SmackDown Live men’s Survivor Series team. They lose a little bit from the sloppiness, but overall a great m—RKO OUTTA NOWHERE!
Match Rating: Seven Gold Medals
AJ gives a spoiler: he beats Brock Lesnar at Survivor Series
Promo Rating: Seven Stone Colds
Paige announces the SmackDown Live women’s Survivor Series team: Carmella, Naomi, Sonya Deville, Asuka, and Charlot… Mandy Rose? Mandy runs her mouth and gets smacked by Naomi. That was weird, and where was Charlotte?
I was mostly listening to Miz and DB argue, and then Samoa Joe makes Hardy tap out to the Coquina Clutch. Sorry, but I don’t know if this match was any good, so I’ll leave it as an undetermined rating.
Daniel Bryan attacks Joe and puts him in the Yes! Lock as Miz pulls him off, then DB attacks Miz! DB throws Shane! Bryan goes nuts! Yes! Yes! Yes! That was a cool finish.
Overall Show Rating: Seven Gold Medals
Balor & Roode wear each other’s jackets and do each other’s mannerisms. Slow and boring action from Bayley and Natalya. She was about to go for a suicide dive before Bobby Roode tagged himself in saying, “You don’t dive! I’m saving you!”
Big Show’s choke slam used to be good when he followed his opponent to the mat. This was meh.
Match Rating: One Gold Medal
Hell yeah! Truth TV! Dance break! And let’s pour some cold water on that boner with Stephanie McMahon and her horrendous entrance music… and what the balls is that dancing she’s doing? Odin almighty… just knock it off. But OH! HERE COMES THE MONEY! I just really don’t want this to turn into a two-hander for the McMahons. Well here comes Vince, and that’s exactly what this is. At least this was not a total McMahon family jerk off, it was a McMahon family dance break! I’m all for that. Great job.
Alicia Fox takes care of the comedy early before Balor and Mahal put on a good show. Sunil Singh catches Bayley and asks if she want to “Bollywood Dance”. I used to work on an inpatient psych unit, so I feel like I’m qualified to say that Alicia Fox deserves to be in there more than most of the patients I observed.
Let’s not pretend we’re here to see anything other than Braun Strowman smashing Kevin Owens. However, I do love watching Ember Moon wrestle. I love Owens pleading with Natalya, “Don’t let her tag!” Owens’ insults are entertaining. “Congratulations, you’re eight years old.”
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